Social media is killing your relationship – believe it or not. The analogy of social media and how it is killing your relationship can be likened to sugar to a diabetic patient.
There are so many advantages of social media to humanity, especially in how it has eased communication by making the world a global village. So, it is somewhat difficult to actually convince some people that it has done more harm than good.
While we gain and experience improvements on every other side, our relationships appear to often be at the receiving end. Despite the ease of communication that social media offers, people have become more apart from each other than ever.
Gone are the days when couples engaged in meaningful one-on-one conversations – we do not talk to each other anymore. Everyone is so busy on their phones – hooked on social media – to the detriment of those around us.
It is safe to say that, by connecting us to people millions of miles away, social media has deprived us of connecting with those around us – the ones that truly matter.
Below, I have highlighted various ways in which social media is killing your relationships.
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15 Ways Social Media Is Killing Your Relationship
1. It Destroys One on One Conversations
What is the essence of a relationship without one-on-one conversations? We can send a million ‘Laughter’ emojis during a chat conversation, but it is nothing compared to a physical smile.
Social media has eradicated one on one conversation, and this has greatly affected companionship in relationships. Physical conversations promote bonding and companionship; but with social media, the reverse is the case.
2. Social Media is Addictive
Addiction is never a good thing, and social media is addictive. As human beings, we are never satisfied with the number of hours we dedicate to social media.
It is no longer news that social media is perhaps the most addictive activity in the world today. Addiction is a slow killer and this empowers social media to give your relationship a natural death.
3. Social Media Takes the Place of Your Partner
There is space in your life for only one person – or activity. What is the last thing you see before you go to bed at night and what is the first thing you turn to when you wake up in the morning?
Exactly, it is your mobile phone. We check to see who has ‘liked’ our last post or made a comment. We want to see the latest updates from our contacts and know what the latest trends are.
Due to the amount of time we dedicate to social media, there is no time life for our partner.
4. Social Media Kills Intimacy
You can say that again. Intimacy is long dead and buried in our society today – it died a natural death! Social media has killed our demand and acceptance for intimacy.
Gone are the days when people need or provide a shoulder for others to cry on. Today, we will pick the option to be cuddled on bed surfing through our social media accounts, rather than to be cuddled in a warm embrace.
5. It Gives Reasons for Conflict
With social media, there is always a reason for conflict. Whether it is over a photo that was posted online – or was not posted, or it is a comment on your post.
Social media gives reasons to conflict between partners, whether they share the same social media orientation or not. With social media, there is always a reason for a fight.
6. Social Media Brings Up the Past
Through old photos or past updates, it is easy for your partner to believe there is more to your personality than there really is.
Or it may be a comment from one of your ex, or a guilty pleasure – and you thought your paths will never cross. But lo and behold, social media connects the both of you again, and now your relationship – which you cherish so much, is threatened.
You can cut ties with people physically, but social media never cuts ties. They will always be in your face in the media space and they can easily search and contact you whenever they so desire.
7. Social Media Gives Room for Assumptions and Insecurities
Partners never trust each other’s activities on social media. They are always suspecting that the other person is chatting and connecting with the opposite sex.
These assumptions are seeds that can grow into big insecurities and become detrimental to your relationship.
People are naturally very protective of their social media conversations – even when there is nothing evil to hide, and this gives partners the avenue to assume the worst.
8. Social Media Leads to Unworthy Comparison
Social media is killing your relationship by exposing you to an array of ‘options’. Both partners are constantly exposed to people who seem to speak better, look prettier or more handsome, more endowed and physically fit, etc.
This exposure leads to comparison which involves partners comparing their spouses to the personalities they are seeing online. Partners also begin to compare their relationships to the ones that are flaunted online, highlighting how theirs does not measure up.
9. The Risk of Infidelity
Social media can influence individuals to become unfaithful to their spouses. Imagine someone who is actually more connected, wealthy, and good-looking than you are, approaching your partner on social media.
What are the chances that he/she will not indulge? Either way, the chances are slim, and the negative influence from social media can lead you or your partner to do something that you naturally will not do.
10. Social Media Can Lead to Bad Habits
Social media is a powerful influencer and it can make even the bad things look cool. According to a report by an activist group in the U.S.A., habits like masturbation and smoking are majorly influenced by social media.
When your partner finds out such habits or vice versa, it can lead to the end of the relationship. It may look cool to one, but remains totally unacceptable by the other.
11. Questions Your Founding Values
Social media will make you or your spouse question your founding values, and this is one of the ways social media is killing your relationship.
Have you ever been faced with a situation where you find yourself admiring someone for something you never thought you could associate yourself with ever? The catch is that, while you may see new reasons to accept it – against your founding value, your partner may not.
This could lead to a break in the relationship – with one partner thinking the other is inconsiderate and rigid to change, while the other terming the other a “loose cannon”.
12. It Promotes a Fake Personality
Not everything you see on social media is true and real. Your addiction to social media could see you unconsciously practicing a fake personality.
The funny thing about it is that you may be blinded to this influence or change – but your partner won’t be. So it is one of the ways social media can kill your relationship.
13. Social Media Connects You Without Your Consent
So, you are trying to explain to your partner that someone who is your friend on social media is not your ‘friend’?
Due to Artificial Intelligence, social media connects you to people in your neighborhood or place of work without your consent.
Gone are the days when someone actually needs to ask for your phone number before they can reach you, or ask for your personal details. Today, an annoying neighbor can get right into your DM without your consent. This is one of the ways social media is killing your relationship.
14. It Makes People Build a Fake Family
Once you have a ‘social media family’, your relationship and your partner become second to it. You will see yourself going to them for advice and opinions – something that your partner may find insulting.
Also, the people in your new ‘family’ may offer you advice that is not tailor-made for your relationship. Every relationship is distinct, and just because a piece of certain advice or technique worked for someone doesn’t mean it would work for yours.
Sadly, it may kill your relationship. Social media promotes such a possibility.
15. Social Media Promotes Privacy Abuse
Social media has the tendency of promoting privacy abuse in your relationship, and this may end up in breaking the relationship.
Imagine a scenario when one partner is always posting ‘everything’ on social media and the other partner does not like the action.
For instance, there is an argument between the both of you over a very sensitive issue, and you found out your partner has related the whole issue on her Whatsapp status, reporting you to her ‘social media family’. What will be your reaction?
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How to Prevent Social Media from Killing Your Relationship
Yes, you need to take conscious steps to prevent social media from killing your relationship. You cannot be too careful when it comes to social media.
If your relationship is special to you, then you will need to protect it from social media. To protect it, you will have to protect yourself and protect your partner also.
How will you do this? I have compiled a list of points to show you how to prevent social media from killing your relationship.
8 Ways to Prevent Social Media from Killing your Relationship
1. Be In Control of Your Life – and Your Social Media
You should always be in control of your life and how your social media activities. It is very easy to be overwhelmed and influenced by social media, but you must try to always be in control.
Otherwise, social media will dictate the pace, control your life and kill your relationship.
2. Your Life is Not a Circus
Another way to prevent social media from killing your relationship is to never try to entertain others with your life.
Except you are an entertainer and your career is built around entertaining people, you have no business entertaining people on social media.
When you do this, you unconsciously lose the essence of the things and people that matters most to you – your relationship inclusive.
3. Do Not Allow social Media Be Your Adviser
Do not take lessons or advice from social media. The online space is dominated by people of diverse backgrounds and influences. You need to be careful of what you consume – so that you will not be consumed.
If you cherish your relationship, you should beware of making social media your pool for advice.
4. Protect Your Privacy
Social media is originally designed to abuse privacy, if you are not careful, it will mess you up. You need to consciously protect your privacy while using social media.
To achieve this, you must know that there are certain features you ought not to enable, and many activities you need to consciously eliminate.
5. Keep Your Sanity in Check
As a social media user, you are bound to lose your sanity to the detriment of your relationship. You must not overthink anything or overindulge in anything related to social media.
You can be aware of trends, but do not allow the trends to own you. Once you get lost in social media, you will lose everything – including the foundations on which your relationship stands.
6. Do Not Use Social Media to Blackmail
Many people go through their partner’s social media accounts to dig out old updates or comments that they can use as a tool for blackmail.
No, try all you can not to be that person. If your intention is to blackmail your partner with their past, then you shouldn’t be in that relationship in the first place.
7. Do Not Take Your Fight to Social Media
When you have fights with your partner – which you would, do not take it to the streets of social media. When you do, you will find people who will feed you with evil opinions and pieces of advice that will destroy your relationship.
There are so many bitter people on social media. Do not allow yourself to become a disciple of hatred.
8. Resist the Temptation to Cheat on Social Media
Many people will flirt with you on social media. They will offer you everything you have always dreamt of.
Try all you can to resist the temptation of cheating on your partner with someone you met on social media, it never ends well – and no, yours won’t be any different!
