The excitement attached to loving a girl is overwhelming, I know but seeing a girl you love is one thing and knowing when to approach her is another thing. You might find it tasking especially if you’re new to these things.
But no matter how tasking it can be, you deserve to have the girl you love to yourself. To achieve that, you must follow the due process which includes knowing what it means to ask her to be your girlfriend, being able to define your intention towards her, and knowing when you’re ready to ask her to be your girl.
Not to worry, all that is here to help you get the girl you love and enjoy the relationship.
What It Means to Ask Her to Be Your Girlfriend
Every guy out there has different intentions for asking a girl out. When some guys ask a girl out, what they really want is a bedmate or rather a sex doll but to some, it’s a serious business.
Ideally, when you ask a girl to be your girlfriend, you’re asking her to enter into a relationship with you, where you both will keep yourselves for each other and work in unity to achieve a common goal which is usually marriage.
Hence, whenever you are harboring the thought of getting a girl to be your girlfriend, you are indirectly asking her to enter a relationship with you, which must have a common aim.
Why Do You Want Her to By Your Girlfriend?
It’s a very necessary question that you must answer before taking any step. Why do you want her to be your girlfriend? You must define your reason.
Do you want her just to satisfy your sexual desire? Do you want her to be your girlfriend because she has the solution to a problem you’ve been trying to put to an end? Or you see her as one who completes you and wants to keep her for the rest of your life? You should be able to spell it out.
This will help when you confront her because some girls who have value for themselves will ask you this question and to avoid embarrassing yourself in her presence, have the answer to this question handy.
When you have known why you need her in your life, the next question you must answer is, are you ready to have her as your girlfriend? If you’re yet to discover if you’re ready, these tips will help you through the process of discovery:
How to Know You’re Ready to Ask Her to Be Your Girlfriend
1. You’re financially independent
The cliché ‘Money isn’t everything’ might be true but not totally acceptable. Before you ask a girl out, you must be ready to cater to her needs at least to some extent.
You don’t want to be that kind of man that won’t be able to save his girl from situations that involves money. If you don’t have anything doing, place your hands at work with something that can yield you money because money makes relationships sweeter. If you are capable of taking care of her financially, then, you are ready.
2. You are self-aware
The worst thing that can happen to anyone is going into a relationship without the knowledge of the self. Relationship is emotionally demanding and as such you must ensure you discover, understand and accept who you are.
You will never be able to make your girl happy or even understand her if you’re yet to define your personality. If you’re sure you know yourself and have studied yourself to understand why you do the things you do, you’re ready to love and be loved.
3. You aren’t afraid to commit
Once she says yes to you, automatically, you become hers and she becomes yours. What this means is that you are not allowed to give yourself to another person again, you’re not permitted to love another for any reason.
If you understand this and you’re willing to go on this journey with her, then, you’re ready.
4. You understand her person
This is another thing you should take note of. Have you been able to understand her way of life, the kind of things she loves doing, the kind of places she visits often, her style of dressing, and even what she wants in her man?
It’s true that you can’t know her in detail but there are important things you must know about a girl before asking her out to avoid regrets. If you think you’ve known her, you are ready to ask her out.
5. You’re sure you’re ready
What is yourself saying to you? What is your heart saying? If you’re settled inside about the action you’re about to take, you should go ahead with your plans, because your heart will always tell you the truth. If you’re sure, waste no time because she might just be waiting for you to make a move.
Also Read: Reasons Women Pull Away & How to Handle It
6. You can stand any outcome
The decision you’re about to take looks simple but risky in a way. When you want to ask a girl out, you’re literally about to ask her to take care of your heart. Have you thought of what might happen in two or five months? Have you imagined what might happen if she abandons you after investing a lot? If you thought about all these and believe that you can stand any outcome, you’re ready.
7. You’re ready to share
Once she comes into your life, you will begin to share almost everything with her. Your time, your couch, money, and even your friends too. So, are you willing to share? That’s the question. If your answer is yes and you’re sure of it, you can go ahead with your plan.
8. You’re ready to forgive
That’s an important component of a relationship because she is imperfect and can err from time to time. She might do things that no one else has done to you before and forgiveness will be required if the relationship will still stand.
If you accept that she will get on your nerves at some point and you’re sure that you will be able to forgive her, you should ask her out because you’re ready.
9. You’re willing to be plain
Oh yes! The moment she says yes to your request, you will lose the right to keep certain secrets. You will lose the right to sleep outside your home without telling her, you will lose the right to hang out with every girl you see without explaining who they are to her.
You see, relationship is emotionally demanding and you must be ready before going in. If you’re ready to be totally honest with her in all your dealings, you’re free to ask her.
10. You can be trusted
Can she trust you with her heart? That’s what you should ponder on. Before you ask her out, check within you to know what you want from her. Is it just what is under her skirt or you really want to take care of her heart. If you’re certain that you are after her heart, you can go ahead with your plan.
11. You are good with jokes
This might sound funny but girls love guys that can make them laugh hard all the time. They don’t ever want to do anything with grumpy men.
You might think you have the money to make her happy but if that’s all you’ve got, she might take the money from you and go look for happiness elsewhere even without you knowing. So you must package your sense of humor alongside to make her all yours.
12. You can give her unwavering support
Can she count on you? Can you support her through her dreams? Can you help her grow her business or career to the level she wants? Can you? Seat and answer these questions, because it matters, especially if she’s a goal-oriented lady. Those are the things she will could look out for before saying yes to your request.
13. You stay in a good apartment
Well, this might not be a criterion but if you think about it, you will understand that you need a good apartment first before asking her out. What if she decides to visit you and also wants to sleep over but can’t because your place is stuffy and uncomfortable. Instead of planning on having a girl which will include more bills, first get an apartment and be independent financially.
14. You understand the importance of respect
Most men don’t know that ladies also deserve to be respected and so, they carry their shoulders around feeling like a boss that should only be respected while condescendingly speaking to their women.
Before you ask her out, be ready to respect her in every ramification. If you don’t agree with this notion, you’re not ready.
15. You’ve bought a course on relationships
It’s expedient that you get yourself equipped with knowledge on how to make your relationship a successful one by paying to learn from experts.
Well, it’s not compulsory to buy a course, what’s compulsory is having someone you look up to on relationship matters. That will help you especially when complicated issues arise in your relationship. [Also Read: Signs Your Crush Like Someone Else]
16. You don’t mind loving her family
Relationship, most times, does not just involve the two parties but two families to some extent. If you don’t have any issue with extending the love you have for her to her siblings and parents, you’re ready and can ask her out.
17. Your family accepted her
It’s always wise to tell your family about your plan before going to her especially if you have the intention of proposing later.
This will save you the stress of convincing your parents and siblings after you might have proposed marriage to her. If you’ve done so and your family is good with your decision, it’s a sign that you’re ready and will make her happy.
18. You are willing to compromise
Relationship is about compromising for the betterment of the one you say you love. Will you be willing to forfeit going to the club just to take her to the salon? It sounds funny but you must be able to compromise at some point to ensure that happiness remains in the relationship. If you know you’re capable, go ahead and ask her to be your lover.
19. You’re ready to love unconditionally
Let’s assume she tells you that she’s a single mother after you’ve told her what you want from her, will you still want her for you? Or she tells you that she’s an HIV patient, how about that?
You must be ready to love her unconditionally, you must make up your mind before approaching her. Who knows? She might actually be a single mother.
20. You’re willing to seek her opinion
Not all men understand that women also have a say on things that matters and that’s very bad. Women, just like men, are humans too and they deserve to be heard as well. If you are willing to ask for her opinion, you’re a man and it’s your kind of man that she deserves.
Since you are aware of how to know if you’re ready to ask her to be your girlfriend, another thing that might be a bother to you is the right time to make your intention known to her.
It’s not something to worry about, read through to know when you should ask her out.
When Should I Ask Her to be My Girlfriend?
In as much as you want everything to be perfect, you want to do everything in the right way to avoid getting a ‘No’ for an answer, you must understand that there’s no perfect time to ask a girl out.
Just as we all have different attitudes, so also, our relationships are different, and this is why you must stick with what walks for you.
Some men ask their girls out after two months, some after six months, and some within one week they met each other and they all have successful relationships.
The number of months you both dated before deciding to start a relationship doesn’t make your relationship a successful one, what makes a relationship last is understanding and total commitment from both parties.
There’s no general rule that states exactly when to ask a girl out but there is an ideal timeline but you’re not mandated to follow.
1. Six months: If you met each other on dating sites, it’s advisable to give yourselves the chance to get to know each other and also cut off engagement with other people.
2. Three months: If you’ve been dating for a while, three months is enough to know her well and also to ask her for more. If she accepted to go on dates with you for three months, it means that she is also ready to make it official. So go ask her.
3. Two months: This will work if you’ve been previously intimate and you enjoy each other’s company but want to move what you have already to another level. Within two months, you must have made your final decision on this matter.
4. One month: If she has been your bestie and knows almost everything you know about yourself. You can just call her and ask her to be your girl within a month.
Before you ask her to be your girlfriend, you must be sure you know what to expect from your relationship with her. You must ensure you have the knowledge of her to keep and make the relationship last.
Below are what you should expect once she says yes to your proposal.
What You Should Be Ready for When You Ask Her to Be Your Girlfriend
1. Commitment: You should be ready to abandon other girls for her, you should be ready to see her as the most beautiful and stick with her through thick and thin. Relationship is for the mature only, hence, when you ask her to be your girlfriend, you must be ready to adore just her and no one else.
2. Less private time: When you ask her to be your girl, you should be ready to have less private time. You should be ready to share your space with her from time to time. If she eventually says yes to your request, you will have no right to keep things to yourself.
3. Be ready to tolerate: No one is perfect, so don’t expect her to be perfect. She will hurt you at a point and do some things against your wish, so when you ask her out, be ready to tolerate her inadequacies.
4. More bills to pay: You love her right? So, you must be willing to spend at least a little on her. You might want to express your love by getting her kinds of stuff like handbags, fancy wears, and the likes, and you need money to do all that. So, when you ask her to be your girl, know that you will be having more bills to pay.
5. Random compliment: Oh yeah, you are not about to date your fellow man but a woman, and women love compliments especially when it comes from the men they love. You must be able to tell her she’s beautiful and dashing even when she just woke up from sleep.
Girlfriend Expectations from Boyfriend You Need to Remember
1. Compliment: Girls love to hear sweet things from their boyfriends often, they don’t get used to or tired of it. They always want to hear you tell them how beautiful they look, they want you to notice their new hairdo, and how much they bring you joy. If you fail to do so, she might ask for a break and her reason will be that you don’t love her even if you do.
2. Protection: One of the major reasons ladies need men in their lives is for protection purposes. They love to know that they have men who they can run to in times of pain and difficulty, they want to have someone who watches their back at all times. Protection here doesn’t only refer to physical protection but more of emotional protection.
3. Reassurance: The sentence ‘I love you’ is very important to them. They expect to hear you say it immediately they wake up, when they dress for work, when they return from work, and when they are about to sleep, they can’t just get enough of it and so you must be ready to always tell her you love her and also assure her that you’re never leaving.
4. Appreciation: Whoever said that the best 3 sentences in a relationship are ‘I love you’, I am sorry’, and ‘Thank you’ is a genius because that is what it is. She expects to hear you say thank you whenever she does something worth it, she expects you to appreciate her presence in your life and not the other way round. Your name will be registered in the book of good men if you learn how to say thank you.
5. Affection: What is a relationship without affection. If you can’t express your love for her, then you shouldn’t ask her out in the first place. It’s true she loves hearing you say you love her, but she likes it more when you express your love for her in diverse ways.
6. She expects you to pamper her: It’s in their genetic makeup, so don’t freak out on seeing this. Girls will never go to any man that doesn’t know how to pamper them, and they feel frustrated whenever their men suddenly stop pampering them. They love to have men that will notice their pain from their faces and look for how to help them out of it, they love to be cuddled from time to time, how about the forehead kisses, it’s something they can’t trade for anything.
7. Honesty: Above everything else, girls love to have men that they can count on even when they are not together. They expect you to stay true to your words even without being watched. They don’t accept men who tell lies or keep secrets; no one does anyway. If you’re gonna be her best man, you must decide to be and stay honest with her in everything you do.
8. Sudden hugs: You don’t know how much they love surprise hugs. They expect you to be spontaneous with your show of affection. They love it when their men aren’t predictable when it comes to showing how much you love them. Hug them from behind while they are cooking or doing the dishes, hug them when they are about the dress the bed, they love it so much.
9. Surprise gifts: Yes, you can tell her in advance to prepare for shopping the next day, they love that but appreciates the red lingerie you buy for her while coming back from work more. She will prefer you to notice what she needs and give it to her without her asking for it. It makes her feel loved and accepted.
10. Respect: She understands that she will respect you as the man in the relationship but she also wants you to respect her as the woman in your life. No one will be okay when insulted no matter who it’s coming from and so she expects that you respect her opinion, choice, or decision.
You’re not expected to be a perfect boyfriend because perfection is a myth, you’re just expected to try to meet the needs of the girl you say you love, that’s all.
Ensure you try your best to keep the relationship going by meeting at least, a few of her expectations.